New Speak

Original Word or Phrase	Politically Correct Word or Phrase
Abortion	Emergency Contraception
Accomplice	Co-Conspirator
Alimony	Spousal Support
Apartments	Community Rentals
Arson	Reckless Burning
Bad	Less Than Perfect
Balloons	Inflatables
Bartender	Mixologist
Bellboy	Bellman
Bird Watcher	Birder
Black	African American
Bleeding to Death	Bleeding Out
Blind	Visually Impaired
Bomb	Implemented Explosive Device
Bombardier	Offensive Systems Officer
Broken Home	Dysfunctional Family
Bum - Hobo	Homeless Person
Butcher	Meat Cutter
Burglary	Home Invasion
Casket	Personal Burial Vault
Cattle	Beef Animals
Church	Worship Center
City	Urban Environment
Civil War	War Between the States
Civilian	Non-Combatant
Committee	Task Force
Concussion	Blunt Force Trauma
Congressman	Congress Person
Conservative	Right Wing Extremist
Craftsmen	Crafts People
Crazy	Psychotic Disorder
Creation	Intelligent Design
Crevice	Crevasse
Crippled	Disabled
Cuisine	Culinary Arts
Curtains - Drapes	Window Treatments
Dead End	No Outlet
Deaf	Hearing Impaired
Deliver (a baby)	Birth (a baby)
Diary	Journal
Died	Passed Away
Disease	Disorder
Do Not Disturb	Privacy Please
Doctor	Prescriber
Dog Catcher	Animal Control Officer
Doll	Action Figure
Drowsiness	Sleep Inertia
Drummer	Percussionist
Easter Eggs	Spring Spheres
Emergency Room	Trauma Center
Employee	Worker
Fire Department	Division of Fire
Fireman	Firefighter
Fireworks	Pyrotechnics
Flooding	Ponding of Water
Foot-Pounds (torque)	Pound-Feet
Forecast	Future View
Forest Fires	Wildfires
Free	You Just Pay the Shipping
Garbageman	Sanitation Worker
Girlfriend	Partner
Global Warming	Climate Change
Goalie	Goal Tender
Grocery Store	Food Store
Gun	Automatic Weapon
Gun Collection	Personal Arsenal
Hairdresser	Licensed Cosmetologist
Half Mast	Half Staff
Handicapped	Disabled
Handicapped	Physically Challenged
Harass	Harris
Harmonica	Mouth Organ
Hatchback (car)	Five-Door
Helicopter	Air Ship
Hero	Anyone
Hit and Run (accident)	Hit Skip
Homosexual - Queer	Gay
Housewife	Domestic Engineer
Housewife	Stay-at-Home Mom
Hunter	Urban Outdoorsman
Husband - Wife	Soul Mate
Iced Tea	Sweet Tea
Illegal Alien	Inadmissible Alien
Illegal Alien	Unidentified Foreign National
Illegal Immigrant	Irregular Migrant
I'm Sorry	My Bad
Indian	Native American
Indigestion	Acid Reflux Disease
Initiation	Hazing
Injury	Trauma
Janitor	Maintenance Technician
Jellyfish	Sea Jellies
Jungle	Rain Forest
Junior High School	Middle School
Kidnapper	Hostage Taker
Knowledge	Awareness
Laptop	Notebook
Larceny	Unlawful Appropriation of Goods
Librarian	Library Assistant
Lie	Spin, Verbal Misstep
Life Jacket	Floatation Device
Mailman	Postal Worker - Mail Carrier
Mankind	Humankind
Masseuse	Massage Therapist
Mechanic	Automotive Technician
Microphone	Acoustical Sensor
Midget - Dwarf	Little Person
Mood Swings	Bipolar Disorder
Mute	Non-Verbal
Night	Pre-Dawn Hours
Nightmares	Night Terrors
Oriental	Asian
Pain	Discomfort
Paramedics	First Responders
Parental Correction	Time Out
Parole	Ex-offender Re-entry
Passenger	Terminal Commuter
Pay (money owed)	Retire the Debt
People	Humans
People	Persons
Performer	Presenter
Ping-Pong	Table Tennis
Pistol	Handgun
Plastic	Composite Material - Carbon Fiber
Police Department	Division of Police
Police Department	Safety Center
Policeman	Law Enforcement Officer
Poor	Economically Marginalized
P.O.W.	Enemy Combatant
Prison	Correctional Facility
Prison Guard	Correctional Officer
Prisoner	Detainee
Prostitution	Human Trafficking
Recession	Economic Downturn
Rerun	Encore Presentation
Rerun	Previously Recorded
Restaurant	Eatery
Retarded	Mentally Challenged
Rifle	Assault Weapon
Right	Privilege
Riot	Flash Mob
Roads	Surface Streets
Robe	House Coat
Roommate	Suitemate
Running Away	Felony Evading
Runs Batted In (RBI - Baseball)	Runs Driven In (RDI)
Salesman	Retail Associate
School	Community Learning Center
School Closing (weather)	Calamity Day
Sedated	Medically Induced Coma
Serve (food)	Plate it Up
Shed	Outbuilding
Shoes	Footwear
Shoulder (road)	Clear Recovery Area
Shovel	Entrenchment Tool
Shyness	Selective Mutism
Siamese Twins	Conjoined Twins
Sinking	Taking on Water
Slave Trader	Human Trafficker
Slingshot	Wrist Rocket
Sniper	Sharpshooter
Snitch	Confidential Informant
Snow Flurries	Snow Showers
Soap	Body Wash
Spokesman	Spokes Person
Spouse	Life Partner
Spring	Resistance Coil
Stabbing	Sharp-Force Injury
Starfish	Sea Stars
Station Wagon	Crossover
Stewardess	Flight Attendant
Store Security Guard	Loss Prevention Technician
Stove	Cooktop
Strip Mining	Surface Mining
Stripper	Exotic Dancer
Stroke	Brain Attack
Submarine	Submersible
Sun Roof	Moon Roof
Suspect	Person of Interest
Suspended (police officer)	Paid Vacation
Teacher	Educator
Teenager	Pre-Adult
Terrorism	Violent Extremism
Terrorist	Insurgent
Thief - Robber	Gunman
Thumbtack	Pushpin
Tidal Wave	Tsunami
Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers	Tomb of the Unknowns
Tradesmen	Trades People
Traffic Accident	Aggravated Vehicular Homicide
Traffic Circle	Roundabout
Trailer Park	Mobile Home Community
Transvestite	Transgender
Travel Agent	Leisure Travel Consultant
Truck	Motor Carrier
Truck	SUV
Used	Pre-Owned
Vacation	Road Trip
Vacuum	Pressure Differential
Vandalism	Criminal Damaging
Waiter - Waitress	Server
War	Military Conflict
Woman	Person
You're Welcome	Thank You
Zookeeper	Animal Handler

Thanks and a tip of the hat to "Grizzly: http://home.roadrunner.com/~grizzly/correct.html

Race for GOP Party Chair might get pretty dirty

Expect personal attacks to begin any minute.

Heaven only knows 

what heinous things 

I might have done!

He's been sued!

Yup - not only that more than once to boot! ( In over 30 years - what self-employed hasn't?)

What else?

We'll have to wait and see.
I've already heard rumblings that are laughable.

Tougher Penalties For Using Cellphone While Driving

Distracted drivers beware: 

The penalty for talking on a handheld cellphone while driving in Connecticut could get a lot tougher.

Daniela Altmari; The Hartford Courant

Unfortunately there's been no mention of any new penalties for those that refuse to get out of the left lane.  

In answer to the perpetual question; "When and where was the photograph taken?"  Off the internet around 9am 4/15/2011

Rebuilding The Connecticut Republican Party

Since the founding of the party itself, never in over 152 years have Connecticut Republicans held not one seat in the U.S. Senate, House of Representatives and not one State Constitutional Office either.

Connecticut Republicans find themselves in the unenviable position of being held hostage in the bluest state in the nation. 

Party members are disillusioned, disgusted, dismayed, distraught, all of which could lead to the party to becoming even more dysfunctional!
What's worse is our losses have led to a large portion of party regulars that are now  demoralized!

We'll have to re-engage the party before we can re-energize it. 

 Here's one of the ways we might consider to do that.

Before we decide to pull 

the plug on life support, 

why not 1st call in some interns?

 No - not those interns.

These interns!

College students! 

They earn credits, 

we buy pizza!

We're going to have our work cut out for ourselves and there's little doubt we'll need all the help we can get knitting the party back together from Putnam to Greenwich, but unless we reconnect with our base we will not prosper as a political party.

Putting forth an effort to attract as many college interns as possible can only help the Connecticut Republican Party.   We can call them "Community Organizers"; that has a catchy sound doesn't it?

How to win only 42 of 169 towns & still become Governor

The 2010 Republican candidate for Connecticut Governor won 3 times as many towns as his opponent, but lost anyway.

Republican candidates rarely do well in cities so ignoring them shouldn't make any difference right?

Wrong.

Here's how the conscious decision to write off the cities cost the entire election.

CTGOP_GOV_06_10

We Republicans Have To Stop Acting Like This

Connecticut Republicans have come to the realization that somehow we missed a nationwide Republican landslide.

2010 was the best year in the history of the Republican Party.

Nationally the party took more state legislative seats in 2010 than ever before in the party's history. 

We dodged a landslide.

Here in Connecticut, and for a variety of reasons we didn't fare so well.

One of the reasons is our tendency to apply our own political purity tests which creates infighting, unnecessarily bloody primaries, and in the end victories for Democrats.

We'll agree on virtually everything, find some point of disagreement and withdraw our support at least, or attack our own at worst. 

Traveling around the state speaking to Republican leaders and Town Committees the one thing I hear the most often is `We've got to stop infighting - it costs us too many close elections....'

I've often compared this weird counter-productive habit of ours to "The Baptist Joke". Most people understand what I'm referring to, but the remark elicits puzzled looks from others.

So here's "the famous Baptist joke" which clearly has nothing to do with Baptists or anyone else - except maybe we Republicans!

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

"Well, there's so much to live for!"

"Like what?"

"Are you religious?

"He said, "Yes.

I said, "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

"Christian."

"Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant."

"Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist."

"Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

"Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

The Brain Transplant

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where a family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber .

"I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news, he said as he surveyed the worried faces. The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.  It's an experimental procedure, very risky, but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the BRAIN."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a time, someone asked, 'How much will a brain cost?'

The doctor quickly responded, "$5000 for a Democrat's brain; $200 for a Republican's brain."

The moment turned awkward. Some of the Democrats actually had to 'try' to not smile, avoiding eye contact with the Republicans. A man unable to control his curiosity, finally blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the Democrat's brain so much more costly than a Republican's brain?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to price the Republican's brain a lot lower because it's been used."